I turned 33 on the 15th and while that still seems pretty young to me I can’t help but reflect on how different my life is now from just a couple of years ago. So much has changed in this sliver of time and I feel like I’ve been working really hard to get here and am just starting to recognize that and am proud of the things I have accomplished. There’s still a lot more work to do of course, there always will be but I am content feeling my life is headed in a healthy and happy direction. My birthday is so close to the New Year that I always use it as the time to set intentions for what I would like to change or work on. Some of these things are leftovers from previous years and others are new and exciting. I just thought I’d write them out to have a little accountability so maybe I will actually remember to drink enough water.
Be The Change I Want – I put this one first because it is definitely the hardest for me and the most important. I have loads of supportive and awesome people in my life who I am so thankful for but I can’t expect them to make all the changes and do all the work for me, or ultimately to make me happy. That is my job to do for myself.
Make My Health a Priority – After having Greta I definitely let my health slip away from me and suffered the consequences. Before getting pregnant I was eating a pretty clean diet and exercising regularly. I let that all fall by the wayside early into the pregnancy when I could not even look at a vegetable, let alone eat one. The hatred of all things green didn’t last that long but I got in the habit of eating things I know don’t make me feel great, like alllllll the gluten and sugar. I’ve finally cut out gluten for good and am working on reducing my sugar – that seems to be the hardest because I love baking treats!
Ask For Help – This is something I have a really hard time with, being the stubborn Capricorn that I am. I went way too long without regular childcare which definitely drove me crazy. It took a long time to give myself permission to do it and not feel like a bad mom because I need time by myself. Luckily I have an amazing neighbor who runs an in-home daycare that is affordable and so convenient for us. Greta gets to go there to play with other kids two days a week for a few hours and I get to do super exciting things like laundry or organizing the basement. Really though, just having time alone is so important for me so it doesn’t matter what I am doing. Sometimes it’s just sitting in silence for a half hour and that is ok.
Drink More Water – I guess this could go into the health category but I think it is deserving of a solo spot because I am constantly putting it on my lists and never following through. This time I am for real, and to help with it I went out and purchased a water bottle for every activity and situation. I have one with a straw to keep in my car so I don’t have to unscrew a lid (which I had hilariously been trying to do for the past year). I also received a cute new tea mug and have replaced a lot of my coffee with herbal tea which is another great way to stay hydrated in the winter.
Feed My Creativity – One of the hardest parts about becoming a mom has been the loss of free time and therefor my creative projects. I have only recently realized how important it is for me to make something with my hands, something I always did but never really realized how big of an impact it had on me until I stopped doing it. I took a break from my creative self for a good year and became pretty depressed. Luckily I have since found ways to get back into it, the main mediums being knitting and sewing. I LOVE IT. I took a knitting class the fall after Greta was born and finally learned how to go beyond a scarf. I am working on my second sweater for her right now and am so proud that I can make something beautiful out of a ball of sheep fur and some sticks while watching Netflix.
Declutter – Oh man. Ok so I really don’t like to admit this but I think I might have hoarding tendencies so this one is really tough for me. I know I have way too much stuff and feel happier and calmer in a more minimalist environment. This has meant that I have pretty much had to stop going to thrift stores all together which really pains me but I just can’t say no to all the treasures! They are like sad little cast off friends begging for a home and I want to take them all in. Aside from trying to reduce the amount of stuff I am bringing into the house I have been really working to let go of a lot of the things I already have. It mostly feels good which is encouraging but I am so sentimental I know I could never even be in the same room as Marie Kondo. Oh well, working on it!
Go Somewhere – I really need a vacation! Like a fun one where I go on a plane by myself and it is actually relaxing. I fantasize about being in a hotel room all alone with a big white bed and room service. Maybe I will go by myself or maybe with a friend, it will probably only be for a weekend but it will be AMAZING.
Stop Feeling Guilty – This is another thing I have struggled with my whole life and am working so hard to overcome. I was born a worrier and most of the worry comes from feelings of guilt. I said the wrong thing, wasn’t present enough for my daughter, bought the wrong kind of soap. The range is from reasonable to completely ridiculous but I have to learn to let it go.
Garden More – Feeding off of my last post, I have found such pleasure in gardening and really hope to keep it up this year. Last year I went a little crazy with adding and planting new and this year I will do a little of that but also work on fine tuning the spots that are already happy and reviving some sad neglected things that came with our house. You can never have enough David Austin roses though and I will definitely find some space for a few more.
Do It All Over Again – This one is both exciting and terrifying but I have always pictured two kids so we are going to try for another baby soon. Watching Greta around other babies is basically the sweetest thing ever so luckily that is encouraging. Just trying to focus on getting myself in the best shape possible both mentally and physically and hoping for the best. Ahhhhhhhh!